Effective Communication

                                                 

Communication is one thing that makes life beautiful. When done beautifully it facilitates  reconciliation and restores sweet peace and love..

The warm closeness and fellowship that follows reconciliation is really a beautiful thing. So how do we enjoy this?

• Calm down, calm down, calm down
• When you have a misunderstanding or problem with someone, fairly assess and determine the extent of your responsibility in the problem.
• Assess their part in the problem as well
• Ask yourself, "Is it worth bringing up or should I just ignore it?" Some little trivial issues need not cause turmoil, and need not be talked about. For example if it is the 73rd time you are picking up your husband's dirty clothes from the floor, you need not talk about it because you probably already have. The only solution to such issues is employing tact. But do not sweep real issues under the carpet! They will only eat your relationship up. Till it is no more.
• When you have decided to communicate, first choose the right time and place then bring the topic up using respectful and loving words. Be sure to have a sieve of truth, love, grace and meekness on your mouth so no word out of this category will come out.
• Then talk about it, casually and honestly. 
• If feelings have been hurt, ask for forgiveness, do not give excuses and defenses. And also forgive them. If u need to, agree. If not, agree to disagree. Come to a mutual understanding and resume your relationship in sweet fellowship.

May God help us to be thankful for our problems for out of them, beautiful things come.

Romans 12:18 "If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone."

Col 4:6 "Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone."

Finding Our Strength In The LORD

Our Strength surely is to be found in God. There are trials that drain, that strip, that break, that empty, that madden, trials that weaken us-to the core sometimes.

It is at such times that we wonder how on earth we will handle the daily mundane tasks for which we are responsible, how we will handle relating, at least fairly well, with those around us or how we will even smile or in the least bit be at peace...

All these times call for a few things; 

Focusing our eyes on God, presenting our requests to Him and leaving them at His feet. Trusting that He is in control, relying on the grace He gives us moment by moment. 

Spending some time in quietness, just to process the events in your life or the turmoil in your mind. Time goes a long way in allowing us to calm down, bring ourselves to forgive and consider wisely what we ought to do next.

Do not forget to ask for help when you need it, friends, there is always someone there for you (even when you think you are alone). God is always with you, He never leaves you nor forsakes you (even if it may feel so sometimes) and many at times He shows you His love and support through people, even those you least expect.

When you feel weak, remember that weakness is a beautiful thing because it causes us to remember on Whom we actually rely. And it makes the strength of the LORD  shine out bright in stark contrast to our weaknesses, for His glory. 

Friends, may we learn to rely on the LORD for our comfort and strength.

Isaiah 40:29-31

 He gives strength to the weary
    and increases the power of the weak.
 Even youths grow tired and weary,
    and young men stumble and fall;
 but those who hope in the Lord
    will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
    they will run and not grow weary,
    they will walk and not be faint.

In Honor Of Elisabeth Elliot

This wonderful woman loved the LORD and poured out her life for Him. When she past away over a month ago, millions who had been blessed by her celebrated her life around the world. She left a beautiful legacy that encourages us to first and foremost love the LORD and secondly love Him more. All her amazing work will outlive her by far, to God's glory. Here are a few quotes from the wealth of her resources;

“We are women, and my plea is Let me be a woman, holy through and through, asking for nothing but what God wants to give me, receiving with both hands and with all my heart whatever that is.”

“Maturity starts with the willingness to give oneself.”

“I realized that the deepest spiritual lessons are not learned by His letting us have our way in the end, but by His making us wait, bearing with us in love and patience until we are able to honestly to pray what He taught His disciples to pray: Thy will be done.”

“I have one desire now - to live a life of reckless abandon for the Lord, putting all my energy and strength into it.”

“Does it make sense to pray for guidance about the future if we are not obeying in the thing that lies before us today? How many momentous events in Scripture depended on one person's seemingly small act of obedience! Rest assured: Do what God tells you to do now, and, depend upon it, you will be shown what to do next.

“This job has been given to me to do. Therefore, it is a gift. Therefore, it is a privilege. Therefore, it is an offering I may make to God. Therefore, it is to be done gladly, if it is done for Him. Here, not somewhere else, I may learn God’s way. In this job, not in some other, God looks for faithfulness.”

“Restlessness and impatience change nothing except our peace and joy. Peace does not dwell in outward things, but in the heart prepared to wait trustfully and quietly on Him who has all things safely in His hands.”

“I do know that waiting on God requires the willingness to bear uncertainty, to carry within oneself the unanswered question, lifting the heart to God about it whenever it intrudes upon one’s thoughts. Its easy to talk oneself into a decision that has no permanence – easier sometimes than to wait patiently.”

“If we hold tightly to anything given to us unwilling to allow it to be used as the Giver means it to be used we stunt the growth of the soul. What God gives us is not necessarily "ours" but only ours to offer back to him, ours to relinquish, ours to lose, ours to let go of, if we want to be our true selves. Many deaths must go into reaching our maturity in Christ, many letting goes.” 

“Leave it all in the Hands that were wounded for you”.

“One does not surrender a life in an instant. That which is lifelong can only be surrendered in a lifetime.

For more, please check out her resources online.

God bless you

What Would Peace Do?

Peace would know first and foremost that its biggest instrument is it's tongue. It would train its tongue to be slow for starters, slow to speak. Slow enough to say out well thought out responses. It would know that nothing good ever came out of blurting out words!

It would purpose to sieve it's words through a net of love and a net of grace, so that the words coming from it would be loving and gracious so that they would not be found to be disrespectful by the hearers.

It would know that it's state of heart and mind is very important. That out of the fullness of the heart the mouth speaks and thus would do all it could to keep it's mind and heart in order. By dwelling on thoughts that are true, noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable, excellent and praiseworthy. And in doing so, would dissolve the all the wrong attitudes that spill over through it's words. 

Peace would accept the fact that disagreements and strife keep surfacing in all our relationships, and even if it dreaded these moments, it would seek to use these platforms to build it's relationships into stronger and more loving ones. It understands that sweet fellowship and warm closeness follow reconciliation, and it knows that the key to that is; using words that build and not words that tear down during confrontation.

It would strive to live in harmony with everyone, to the best of it's ability, not because it seeks to impress these people but because it seeks to please God.

Peace forgives everyone for everything because it knows that forgiveness frees the heart from all sorts of poison; Judgment, blame, hurt, bitterness, anger.. etc It knows that there is no true inner peace while harboring these emotions. It just lets go. Not because the offences meant nothing, but because it no longer wants to carry these unnecessary burdens. It lays them at the feet of the LORD.

Peace knows one thing for sure, it is not in ultimate control of it's life, God is. Not to say it does not take responsibility for its actions, it does. But it knows that the future is in God's hands so there is no need to worry about it. It knows it is sinful to worry and be anxious because God commands us not to. Does it plan? yes. Prepare? yes. Pray? yes. Be anxious about it? no. And since the past already happened, it does not dwell on it. It lives in the moment, enjoying it as it is.

It has a close cousin called Contentment. They walk hand in hand. Peace knows it needs contentment. Being grateful for what it has. Working hard and diligently? yes. Willing to progress and grow? yes. But all the same, being satisfied and grateful for what it receives.

Peace knows that it comes from God, it is the kind that nothing in this world can give(not even great wealth or absence of trouble) and nothing in this world can take it away. And it knows that the secret to keeping it is in enjoying communion with the LORD as often as possible. Studying the Bible, praying to Him and leaving all its burdens at His feet. It knows that in that sweet surrender lies its freedom.

May God help me, help us to keep this pleasantly peaceful heart.

John 14:27 "Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid."

Col 3:15 "Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful"

What Would Humility Do?

Humility would admit when it does wrong, it would admit and ask for forgiveness. For the sake of reconciliation and the restoration of peace. It would repent to God of its sins and it would make an effort to turn away from all wrong doing.

It would consider more important than self, the people with whom it is. Not because they are higher in stature, but because they are God's very own special creations. 

Humility would say take my privilege, take my honor, I would love to bless you, I would prefer that your needs be met before mine. 

It would easily forgive, not because it does not hurt, but because it is the only way to make peace. For self, and for the offended. It would remember that God forgives us as we forgive those who wrong us. It is God's command to us to forgive.

Humility would not boast or show off, for it would know that there is nothing it has that it has not received, that every good and perfect thing comes from God. And it would be willing to give it all up as an offering to God.

It would not rant or complain about every little thing. It would know that we all receive our share of trials and problems, for the sake of our own growth. It would choose to rejoice in the LORD always. And give thanks in every circumstance.

Humility would comfort those in turmoil, those in pain, those less privileged. For it understands better than most, and is wiser than most. It knows that the comfort we have received is meant to be shared. And it would stay close to the weak, seeking to help them whenever need arises.

It would seek peace and reconciliation even through gracious confrontation, covering up sin with love but also dealing with the sin. 

It would graciously stand up for the truth and would do what is right regardless of the consequences. It would not seek to impress man but would seek to please God. 

It would know that it is nothing without God, a mere worm, a speck of dust. It would not question God but would live in reverence to Him, knowing that there is no greater honor it has received than the one of knowing God. No greater gift than that of receiving salvation, and it would strive to love the LORD God with all it's heart, soul and mind.

Humility would have the great honor of receiving God's grace, of having the LORD dwell with it. It would enjoy the LORD's blessings and favor, and yet it would return all the glory, honor and praise back to HIM.

May God help me, help us, to live with this humble but truly great heart.

Isaiah 57:15 "For this is what the high and exalted One says- He who lives forever, whose name is holy: "I live in a high and holy place, but also with the one who is contrite and lowly in spirit, to revive the spirit of the lowly and to revive the heart of the contrite."

James 4:6 "But he gives us more grace. That is why Scripture says: "God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble."

The 18 Rules Of Living

Today I'll share with you the rules of living the Dalai Lama issued 15 years ago; Some may not have a direct biblical backing but they give us good food for thought. Enjoy...

1. Take into account that great love and great achievements involve great risk.

2. When you lose, don't lose the lesson.

3. Follow the three Rs: Respect for self, Respect for others, Responsibility for all your actions.

4. Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck.

5. Learn the rules so you know how to break them properly.

6. Don't let a little dispute injure a great friendship.

7. When you realize you've made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it.

8. Spend some time alone everyday.

9. Open your arms to change, but don't let go of your values.

10. Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.

11. Live a good, honorable life. Then when you get older and think back, you'll be able to enjoy it a second time.

12. A loving atmosphere in your home is the foundation for your life.

13. In disagreements with loved ones, deal only with the current situation. Don't bring up the past.

14. Share your knowledge. It's a way to achieve immortality.

15. Be gentle with the earth.

16. Once a year, go some place you've never been before.

17. Remember that the best relationship is one in which your love for each other exceeds your need for each other. 

18. Judge your success by what you had to give up in order to get it.

Setting Yourself Apart

It is definitely easier to be ordinary, go with the flow, and do what 'everyone else' finds agreeable. What a life! A low risk life. 

But such a life stirs up little inspiration, leaves little to remember, and hardly builds legacy. It is a life not fully lived.

So why set yourself apart? why stand out? After all, who wants to draw attention to themselves? Show-offs? Maybe. The difference between a show-off and one who is not is that the show-off will boast on and on and on about something, and the one who stands out will diligently keep at what he is doing and his works will speak for him.

One who stands out does so with noble motivations... Proverbs 22:29 "Do you see someone skilled in their work? They will serve before kings; they will not serve before officials of low rank." 

The difference between those who stand out and those who don't is the kind of choices they make. They may be in the same circumstances and face the same opportunities but those who want to stand out make choices that seek to make a difference in this world.

Some of us fear to stand out even if we want to because we do not want to draw attention to ourselves or look better than others. We wrongly think people will not like us when we stand out and we forget that our standing out gives them the courage they need to do the same.

Each of us is God's special creation(Psalm 139) and is gifted specially. Just pray and ask God to show you for what He wants you to set yourself apart. And since it will be for His glory, He will surely show you at the right time.

Col 3:23-24 “Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward. You are serving the Lord Christ.”

Ecc 9:10 “Whatever your hand finds to do, do it with your might, for there is no work or thought or knowledge or wisdom in Sheol, to which you are going.”

Putting God First

When it comes to putting God first, it easily feels like a daunting but necessary task. Especially for those leading busy lives that avail them very little time to pray and study the Bible.

But what does it mean to put God first? I believe it means to be mindful of Him during our daily tasks. Asking, in whatever we do, "Does this glorify God?" Col 3:17 "And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him"

Here are some practical tips that I hope you find helpful on putting God first;

• Make it a point to have communion with God at least once a day. Read your Bible and pray(always remember to pray for your loved ones, acquaintances and leaders as well).
• Cultivate a prayerful heart(you need not be alone or have closed eyes). Pray as often as you can; simple prayers of thanksgiving, surrender, guidance etc. Pray whenever it crosses your mind. 
• Memorize as much scripture as you can and meditate upon it as often as possible. Psalm 1:2 "...but whose delight is in the law of the LORD, and who meditates on his law day and night"
• Just be conscious of God in everything you do, keeping in mind the fact that He is watching you, He is with you and He loves you.

Psalm 91:1-2

Whoever dwells in the shelter of the Most High
    will rest in the shadow of the Almighty.

I will say of the Lord, “He is my refuge and my fortress,
    my God, in whom I trust.”

Finding Deep Satisfaction

We naturally think we will be more satisfied when we receive. Receive more money, receive more opportunities, receive, receive, receive.  And you may feel happy when you receive blessings or money to attend your needs, or gifts of many kinds but it will just make you happy for a while, not satisfied! 

Other times, we feel like our satisfaction will come from accomplishing that which we have set out to do. That will surely give us a sense of accomplishment but no satisfaction.

Our deepest satisfaction comes from doing well that which God has called us to do(or as some will call it, living your purpose on earth); Look around you, what responsibilities has the LORD entrusted you with? Is it obedience to God's word? Is it a spouse?A child? A home? A talent/gift(something you love to do that comes quite easily for you) A job? A dependant? Communing with God? Worshiping Him? A ministry? Friends? Family? Colleagues at work? A burden to do something? Or even a one time opportunity to be bless someone! 

When you look through each of the areas the LORD has entrusted you with, do not ask what these things will do for you. Ask what you will do for them. And when you bless these areas, pouring out your energies to them in love, when you give to them even more than is asked for, one chance at a time, one opportunity at a time, you will begin to see things differently. You will begin to understand that in giving of yourself, you receive more. It is more blessed to give than it is to receive(Acts 20:35). Satisfaction will always be found when you give of yourself for a noble cause. 

Ephesians 2:10 "For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do." We each have our own good works apportioned for us; just because someone you admire enjoys taking care of orphans or leads a bible study does not mean it is your portion as well. 

Start by doing beautifully and passionately the tasks God has placed in your feeble hands. Ask Him to give you the grace creativity you need to accomplish them well, and when you feel like you have even more to offer, pray to God for guidance and follow the burden He places on Your heart.

Enjoy the ride!

Being Renewed

We all need renewal every so often. We need that time of re-connection to our source of life, joy, peace, strength and love. Once a day is great. Once a few days is okay as well(but the more often, the better).

Some of us are pouring out of our lives all the time, spending most of our time serving others, comforting others, counselling others. And others pour out of themselves occasionally. And it is also seasonal; some seasons of our lives we are giving and giving and giving more and others we are not giving as much of ourselves.

In those times when we are giving so much, we better be constantly renewed or else we will break down! Some times we are so busy and we wonder why we are constantly frustrated, impatient and on the edge, yet the answer is lingering in the  background!

So how do we do this? Spend some time, as often as possible, at the feet of Christ; Reading your Bible(there are so many guides to make this easy for you, get one so that you have a sense of follow-through everyday), reading a good book, and just praying and listening to what the Holy Spirit may be impressing on your heart.

This is a golden practice which will go a long way in keeping your step firm, your heart peaceful and your cup filled. 

Psalm 23

 The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing.
     He makes me lie down in green pastures,
he leads me beside quiet waters,
     he refreshes my soul.
He guides me along the right paths
    for his name’s sake.
 Even though I walk
    through the darkest valley,
I will fear no evil,
    for you are with me;
your rod and your staff,
    they comfort me.

 You prepare a table before me
    in the presence of my enemies.
You anoint my head with oil;
    my cup overflows.

Surely your goodness and love will follow me
    all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in the house of the Lord
    forever.

God's Greatness In Our Littleness

The greatness of God is something that can not fit in our feeble minds... It is unfathomable.

Most of us have ideas in our heads of who God is, what He can do and where He is. Some of us even go as far as giving God a skin color because we know Jesus was white. Fitting Him in our own molds as convenient for our beliefs.

Others have given up on the whole idea all together and believe there is no God. When asked, they have an alternative explanation for everything. They need evidence that God exists. I understand that.

Two places are filled with evidence; creation as a whole; People and nature; If you take time to observe creation, you will realize there is so much more going on out there than you actually see. And dying people; If you have had the honor of being next to several dying people(especially those who pass on while lying in their beds), you definitely have several stories to tell. Those who have not surrendered themselves to God usually pass on while struggling, some seeing terrible beings coming for them, while those who pass on after surrendering their lives to God make it look so blissful, some even talk about the beautiful angels they see and even invite any onlookers to join them.

That, for me, is one sure way of knowing that heaven and hell exist. And if heaven and hell exist, their sure is God and a devil somewhere out there. 

But who is this God? His name is I AM. That's the only thing I can confidently say I know. Otherwise, I can not wrap my head around Him. Louie Giglio tried to show us the greatness of God in this lesson How great is our God? After watching it I could not pray for three full days because clearly, I did not know to Whom I was praying. And also, who was I to pray?

Psalm 103

Praise the Lord, my soul;
    all my inmost being, praise his holy name.

Praise the Lord, my soul,
    and forget not all his benefits—

who forgives all your sins
    and heals all your diseases,

who redeems your life from the pit
    and crowns you with love and compassion,
 who satisfies your desires with good things
    so that your youth is renewed like the eagles

The Lord works righteousness
    and justice for all the oppressed.

He made known his ways to Moses,
    his deeds to the people of Israel:
 The Lord is compassionate and gracious,
    slow to anger, abounding in love.
 He will not always accuse,
    nor will he harbor his anger forever;
 he does not treat us as our sins deserve
    or repay us according to our iniquities.
 For as high as the heavens are above the earth,
    so great is his love for those who fear him;
 as far as the east is from the west,
    so far has he removed our transgressions from us.

 As a father has compassion on his children,
    so the Lord has compassion on those who fear him;
 for he knows how we are formed,
    he remembers that we are dust.
 The life of mortals is like grass,
    they flourish like a flower of the field;

the wind blows over it and it is gone,
    and its place remembers it no more.
 But from everlasting to everlasting
    the Lord’s love is with those who fear him,
    and his righteousness with their children’s children
 with those who keep his covenant
    and remember to obey his precepts.

 The Lord has established his throne in heaven,
    and his kingdom rules over all.

 Praise the Lord, you his angels,
    you mighty ones who do his bidding,
    who obey his word.

Praise the Lord, all his heavenly hosts,
    you his servants who do his will.
 Praise the Lord, all his works
    everywhere in his dominion.

Praise the Lord, my soul.